Sneak-Peek of DARE

Contents

 

1. A Crisis of Trust……………………………………………………………………………………………… 3

2. The Leadership Persona…………………………………………………………………………………….

The Fine Art of Deception……………………………………………………………………………………

Perception Management……………………………………………………………………………………….

Eschewing Obfuscation………………………………………………………………………………………..

Self-Deception and Collusion………………………………………………………………………………..

Business as Usual?………………………………………………………………………………………………

DARE!………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

3. What’s Wrong with our Customers?………………………………………………………………….

The Customer Default Position……………………………………………………………………………..

The Customer Trust Position………………………………………………………………………………..

DARE!………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

4. Straight Talk to the Workforce………………………………………………………………………….

Information Brokering………………………………………………………………………………………….

When the Truth Hurts………………………………………………………………………………………….

When We Don’t Have the Answers……………………………………………………………………….

When We Fear Distracting the Workforce……………………………………………………………….

DARE!………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

5.  New Values for Great Leaders…………………………………………………………………………..

The Charismatic Leader………………………………………………………………………………………..

The Self-Aware Leader…………………………………………………………………………………………

Self-Reflection……………………………………………………………………………………………..

Vulnerability………………………………………………………………………………………………..

Honesty and Transparency……………………………………………………………………………

DARE!………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

6.  Customer Conversations…………………………………………………………………………………..

The Emotional Connection……………………………………………………………………………………

Faking Sincerity…………………………………………………………………………………………………..

Transparency Not Optional………………………………………………………………………………….

Undercover Bosses………………………………………………………………………………………………

Raising the Bar…………………………………………………………………………………………………….

DARE!………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

7. Trusting Corporate Cultures…………………………………………………………………………….

The Open Communications Vision………………………………………………………………………..

Spreading the Word………………………………………………………………………………………

Open in Name Only?…………………………………………………………………………………….

Connectors in Chief……………………………………………………………………………………………..

Encouraging introductions……………………………………………………………………………..

Connecting to the community………………………………………………………………………..

Monitoring Diversity Messaging……………………………………………………………………

Embracing the Tools……………………………………………………………………………………..

Making Face Time………………………………………………………………………………………..

Setting the Example………………………………………………………………………………………

Safety Engineering……………………………………………………………………………………………….

Expecting the Best………………………………………………………………………………………..

Modeling Authentic Conversations…………………………………………………………………

Learning to Listen…………………………………………………………………………………………

Being Yourself……………………………………………………………………………………………..

Simple and Sincere………………………………………………………………………………………..

Choosing the Channel……………………………………………………………………………………

Rewards and Recognition……………………………………………………………………………………..

DARE!………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

8. Last Chapter……………………………………………………………………………………………………..

NOTES…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

 

1. A Crisis of Trust

 

There’s a crisis of trust in this country. You can see it everywhere you look. It’s obvious in the abysmal approval rates for members of the U.S. Congress and our general distrust of elected officials at almost every level. It’s evident, too, in the suspicion with which we view our financial and business leaders, our journalists, scientists, regulatory agencies, and educators—almost everyone, in fact, to whom we look for direction and leadership.

Frankly, we don’t believe much, or believe in much, of anything anymore. Studies show that after a brief surge following September 11, 2001, trust in our institutions and each other has been steadily declining for forty years. For those of us who are old enough, just remembering the years of Vietnam, Watergate, junk bonds, Monica Lewinsky, Enron, and the Catholic Church sex scandals will explain some of that decline. But things haven’t been much better for the generations just behind us. From the disinformation that led us into the Iraq war, through the string of financial scandals that wiped out millions in personal wealth,  on and on through the house of toppling cards that became the worst recession in 80 years, our youth have suffered through more than a decade of almost unrelenting dishonesty.

The Baby Boomers, whose famous mantra was, “Don’t trust anyone over 30,” may have been much more skeptical of their leaders and institutions than the WWII cohort that preceded them, but for today’s young people, cynicism is the default position. With overwhelmingly negative views of government and institutions, business and the media, our Gen X and Y youth could easily be labeled the “Jaded Generations.”

There are possible explanations for the generational component to this cynicism. Some of them go well beyond the scandals they’ve witnessed and the lies they’ve been sold. The rise of television and the internet certainly have a place in the equation. Cable and internet news sources now offer a multitude of digital journalists, bloggers, and pundits, all offering up opinions, but diluting the authority of any individual voice. Where their parents and grandparents had only a few, like Walter Cronkite, whose objectivity and integrity could be thoroughly trusted, today’s youth have a cacophony of conflicting voices, all competing with their own versions of the truth.

Electronic and digital media may play other roles. Some theorists have suggested that the time devoted by the young to TV and internet pursuits may exacerbate isolation from larger institutions and traditional American culture. A series of focus groups conducted by Harvard University’s Goodwork project found that the teenagers they interviewed had an “overwhelming” distrust of the media, politicians, and the political process in general. Carrie James, research director for Goodwork, thinks that while these young people might trust family and close friends, “they don’t have good mental models” of how to trust more distant figures.

Regardless of the complexity of the problem, the deep cynicism of American youth is troubling. It suggests that their trust will be hard to recover. Given that these are tomorrow’s leaders, one wonders when, and from where, their mental models for trustworthiness might emerge.  Whether our leaders and institutions can bring back the honesty, accountability, and transparency that will restore their faith.  Or whether the downward spiral of distrust will continue for each succeeding generation.

I’m not at all sure how we got here. I don’t know how Americans became so familiar with deception that we almost expect it. I don’t know exactly how the truth got such a bad reputation that we don’t even strive for it anymore. I don’t know when we came to assume that all communication must naturally be “spin” and every public speech a shallow grab for publicity. I’m not sure why so many of our business, government, and professional leaders have opted for policies that depend on feeding us misinformation, half-truths, and downright lies.

I am sure, however, about the ultimate consequences of those policies. Like everyone else, I’m witnessing them firsthand.

In the short run, and for a few individuals, companies, and institutions, these approaches may work. But in the long run, they won’t. A foundation of trust is essential for all successful human interaction. It’s the grease that facilitates social, political, and economic transactions of every type. To the extent that we are able to trust, we make friendships, enter into marriage and social bonds, and join groups. To the extent that trust diminishes risk and uncertainty, we create businesses and business partnerships, become loyal customers ourselves, and willingly and optimistically participate in our own democracy.

There are wide-reaching sociological benefits to trust. The Pew Research Center has found that in nations where trust is high, crime and corruption are low. The same principle operates in communities, in neighborhoods, in schools, and organizations. Much other research has demonstrated the self-perpetuating nature of trust and the reciprocal benefits that accrue to those who engage on its basis. Even in laboratory experiments, individuals who have been asked to engage in even the simplest trust-demanding transactions develop positive feelings toward their peers Trust, apparently, begets trust. But the corollary is also true.

In the absence of trust, our elected leaders are unwilling to relinquish political power to those with opposing viewpoints, even for a short time. The resulting paralysis breeds more distrust, in the voting populace, among other nations, in those we trade with, those who finance our debt.

For business, trust may be the most critical value. It allows, of course, for the confidence to conduct our own day-to-day business transactions, but much more importantly for faith in our institutions and economy at large. That faith is what allows us, as organizations, but also as individuals, to plan for our futures, to think long-term, to make investments or plant seeds for tomorrow with the expectation that we will see them flourish. When that foundation of trustworthiness erodes, as we’ve recently seen it crumbling beneath our financial systems, the result is profound confusion, a genuine sense of betrayal, the feeling that somehow we’ve been robbed of the very future.

I’ve been concerned about this crisis in trust for some time, particularly as it relates to what I witness and experience every day. In our work at Speakeasy we reach about 4,000 individuals every year in 12 countries, including China and Viet Nam. Our primary audience is corporate executives, but participants in our programs also include non-business professionals like athletes, teachers, doctors, clergy, government leaders, and authors. These are educated, articulate, and experienced leaders. They come to us initially believing that they are among the “good guys”—those enlightened individuals who stand outside and apart from the problems that have led to the pervasive cynicism that plagues our society. Yet many of them are surprised to learn that they themselves are part of the problem, not the solution. They are shocked to discover that in their own leadership practices they have been using their own voices to widen the credibility and confidence gap. They are surprised to learn that distrust is sown not just by criminality and outright fraud, but more insidiously by the varieties of deception that are part of every corporate toolbox.

We’re justifiably proud of the work we do at Speakeasy and the numbers we reach. But in the face of this crisis we all need to do more. This book is my attempt to reach a larger audience. To do whatever I can to try to restore some of the sadly lacking trust that is creating this climate of uncertainty, suspicion and stagnation.

If you are a leader with responsibility and influence, this book is addressed to you. If you are an executive leading a company, a manager leading a department, a pastor leading a church, a supervisor leading a shift of factory workers, a principal leading a school, these pages were written with you in mind. As the title suggests, they will ask you to accept a challenge, a DARE.

It’s a simple challenge on its face, but one that seems extraordinarily difficult for many leaders to take. Indeed, even to think about. Partially because it seems too simple. Mostly because it goes completely against the grain of what they believe a leader is. And that’s not surprising. The attributes that my DARE will ask you to develop are rarely found in executive boardrooms, the halls of government, or other chambers of power.

If you accept my challenge, you will be asked to re-think your entire concept of leadership, of power, and the responsibility of influence. You may be asked to tear down defense systems that you’ve spent a lifetime constructing.

The DARE is this:  I dare you to be honest. To be authentic. To return transparency to your business and personal communications. To discover your true inner voice and become more of who you really are through your own spoken word. To make your word good, and become as good as your word.

I can promise that those of who accept this challenge will reap surprising rewards both in your professional and personal lives. The results will be greater self-awareness, more empathetic understanding of your fellows, more genuine connections and relationships with spouses, children, coworkers and customers. You’ll find renewed energy for the work that you do and fuller realization of your talents and potentials.

I can make these outrageous promises because I know it works. For 38 years, Speakeasy has witnessed the transformations that have occurred in the lives of those who dared to accept this challenge. We receive more than 1,500 letters, emails and phone calls each year from those individuals who have experienced these changes and are still excited about the rippling effects that continue in their professional and personal lives. I’m convinced that you can experience them also. I invite you to try.  I DARE you!

 

Leave a Reply

You must be logged in to post a comment.